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How to make change when the 4 month sleep regressions hits

Every new parent awaits milestones, those beautiful signs that your baby is developing and growing. While many of these milestones are delightful—the first smile, the first word, or that adorable gurgle—some may seem less enchanting at first. One such ‘milestone’ which has garnered a dubious reputation is the 4-month sleep shift. Far too often it’s referred to as the ‘4-month sleep regression’, a term which incites unnecessary worry among parents. So, let’s set the record straight today.

Contrary to popular belief, the 4-month sleep shift isn’t a regression but rather an evolution of your baby’s sleep pattern. It’s an integral part of their natural development that’s here to stay, but with a few guiding principles, you can navigate this transition smoothly.

Understanding Your Baby’s Sleep Cycles

Just like adults, babies go through sleep cycles. For newborns, these cycles involve only two stages, REM sleep (active sleep) and Non-REM sleep (quiet sleep). During the first 3–4 months, newborns largely experience REM sleep, with nap durations ranging from 20 minutes to 4 hours. This flexibility is entirely normal as their sleep patterns aren’t yet as mature as ours.

Around the 4-month mark, your baby’s sleep patterns start maturing. They begin cycling through stages of deep and light sleep, resembling adult sleep cycles more closely. These changes may lead to more frequent wake-ups as they transition between sleep stages, potentially causing shorter naps and more night awakenings.

Supporting Self-Settling Habits With Your Baby

Often at the 4-month mark, your baby’s needs at sleep time evolve. They are beginning to ‘hardwire’ their expectations of how they fall asleep. If they’ve grown accustomed to falling asleep with certain conditions, such as being rocked or fed, they’ll likely need those same conditions to transition back to sleep.

The key to supporting your baby through this stage is to encourage independent sleep. This doesn’t mean you can’t be hands-on. At this age, hands-on settling is absolutely encouraged. But it also involves giving your baby an opportunity to fall asleep independently. The French call this ‘Le Pause’, a concept where you pause and wait before assisting your baby to sleep. This approach provides a buffer for your baby to initiate self-settling, aiding in their sleep development.

Setting Up Successful Sleep Foundations

To effectively navigate this sleep shift, it’s beneficial to review your sleep foundations:

  • Room Setup: Incorporate elements like white noise and blackout blinds to create an optimal sleep environment for your baby.
  • Awake Windows: Monitor and adjust how long your baby is awake for between naps.
  • Dressing & Swaddling: Ensure your baby is comfortably dressed or swaddled for sleep.
  • Falling Asleep: Review and adapt how your baby falls asleep to promote independent sleep.

Adapting to these changes might involve a hands-on settling approach initially, gradually reducing assistance as your baby’s self-settling skills improve. Or, perhaps you’re ready to dive straight into teaching your little one to fall asleep on their own, and therefore get back to linking sleep cycles on their own.

Dispelling Fear Around the 4-Month Sleep Shift

The fear-mongering around the 4-month sleep shift is unhelpful and often misplaced. This shift in sleep patterns is a natural developmental process, not a regression to fear. In fact, both of my babies transitioned through this stage smoothly, already having learned how to fall asleep independently prior to this developmental milestone.

It’s important to remember that every baby is unique. Some may seamlessly adapt to these sleep changes, while others may require a bit more assistance. Neither scenario is cause for alarm, it’s simply a part of your baby’s unique journey of growth and development.

Your Support Network

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, remember you’re not alone. There’s a multitude of resources available, including downloadable sleep guides and personalised support options. As a certified sleep consultant, I’m here to guide you through these moments of transition.

So, let’s banish the doom and gloom associated with the 4-month sleep shift. Instead, embrace this milestone with understanding, patience, and the knowledge that you have the tools and support to navigate it effectively. Always remember, tune into your baby, follow your instincts and reach out for support whenever needed.

At the end of the day, the most important thing is that both you and your baby enjoy a good night’s sleep. With a few adjustments and a lot of love, you can sail through this transition smoothly, one nap at a time.

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